Pete saw it on my desk but doesn't suspect a thing

Patient, handing me a tiny ceramic pot filled with elaborately beaded miniature trees and butterflies: "For you. Gift. Thank you for everything!"

Me, genuinely touched: "Thank you! That's so kind of you!"

Interpreter: "It's bonsai. Handmade out of beads."

Me: "Oh! Well, that's good because I can't kill it, then. Did you make it yourself?"

Patient, nodding proudly. "For you hit husband."

Me: "Pardon me?"

Patient: "For you throw at husband."

Me: "To throw at my husband?"

Interpreter: "That's what we do in Mexico. Throw stuff at our husbands. You know, pots, pans, whatever is handy."

Me: "Well, good thing this is a small object. It won't inflict more than a minor wound."

Interpreter, curious: "You don't usually throw things at him?"

Me: "Not usually, no."